"Minion" first draft finished
It only took eleven and a half months, and my 110 page Martial arts script ended up going a 140 pages (Yikes) but I finally finished the first draft of Minion, typos and all.
Check it out if you want.
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Minion:
Tong is a minion for the Warlord; however, when he is fired by the Warlord, he is forced by the local town to become their hero; unfortunately, Tong is even worse at being a Hero than he was at being a Minion.
Check it out if you want.
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Minion:
Tong is a minion for the Warlord; however, when he is fired by the Warlord, he is forced by the local town to become their hero; unfortunately, Tong is even worse at being a Hero than he was at being a Minion.
Not sure about re-writing, so for the moment I am just hitting ctrl F and inserting "ing" I figure I'll get rid of the "ing" words that don't work.
While I am at it, I'll look at the beginnings and endings of dialog, seeing if I can cut some of it.
I really need to get rid of thirty pages, that is going to be a pain.
Tentative script re-write order:
1) check for spelling mistakes and non-action verbs, while I re-read script.
2) Cut unnecessary dialog.
3) Cut scenes that don't work. Shorten scenes.
4) re-write dialog. Make sure there is conflict in every conversation, every character has their own way of talking.
5) re-write description and action, make sure it is understandable.
6) Cut dialog that tells and not shows. Add scenes in order to show and not tell.
While I am at it, I'll look at the beginnings and endings of dialog, seeing if I can cut some of it.
I really need to get rid of thirty pages, that is going to be a pain.
Tentative script re-write order:
1) check for spelling mistakes and non-action verbs, while I re-read script.
2) Cut unnecessary dialog.
3) Cut scenes that don't work. Shorten scenes.
4) re-write dialog. Make sure there is conflict in every conversation, every character has their own way of talking.
5) re-write description and action, make sure it is understandable.
6) Cut dialog that tells and not shows. Add scenes in order to show and not tell.
My script sucks. The action is flat, the dialog is not clever, the descriptions; vague and long-winded. I managed to get the "catalyst" to page 12 (I would prefer page 10) but the "big event" is still past page 30.
I have cut 10 pages from the script just by chopping scenes that went too long, dialogue that lingered and jokes that fell flat.
Still, I need to cut 20 more pages and find a way to make the script jump off the page instead of sitting there, like a dead moss covered log.
Lot's of work to get this script presentable.
I have cut 10 pages from the script just by chopping scenes that went too long, dialogue that lingered and jokes that fell flat.
Still, I need to cut 20 more pages and find a way to make the script jump off the page instead of sitting there, like a dead moss covered log.
Lot's of work to get this script presentable.
First drafts are supposed to suck :)
Much better to get through it then go back and purge the parts that don't work!
I recommend that you do step #1 last... that way you don't waste time correcting parts you cut later. I think it's more important to correct the substance first, then the form.
I finished my first draft a few weeks ago. I took a break and now I'm ready to trim the fat. Luckily I managed to fit my drama into a nice 109 pages, although it still needs a lot of work. Maybe I'll check out your script sometime if I need a break :)
Good luck with your edits!
Much better to get through it then go back and purge the parts that don't work!
I recommend that you do step #1 last... that way you don't waste time correcting parts you cut later. I think it's more important to correct the substance first, then the form.
I finished my first draft a few weeks ago. I took a break and now I'm ready to trim the fat. Luckily I managed to fit my drama into a nice 109 pages, although it still needs a lot of work. Maybe I'll check out your script sometime if I need a break :)
Good luck with your edits!
I know first drafts are "supposed" to suck; it's just, mine was going to be different, brilliant, vibrant, a masterpiece, the exception ... Then reality struck :(
Still; I am enjoying re-writing, it's fun taking a rough script and slashing away the elements that don't belong. Like a sculptor (Beat) or serial killer...
Still; I am enjoying re-writing, it's fun taking a rough script and slashing away the elements that don't belong. Like a sculptor (Beat) or serial killer...
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